Squoze

Juice for shareholders. Pulp for the grindset.

Our poor mascot, Melvin. Just a little skeleton trying to hold it together while that familiar corporate fist tightens around him.
Another round of layoffs? Cool. Simply absorb the workload and smile through the squoze.
Those gears won’t grease themselves you know...

Printed on the Bella + Canvas unisex tee. Soft, breathable, and flattering enough to get crushed in style.
The “Squoze” tee features your favorite burnt-out mascot, mid-squish, framed by a highly chantable corporate mantra for those days where you feel extra unmotivated.

Bella Shirt Size Guide:

Features:

– 100% ring-spun cotton, slightly corrupted by capitalism
– Side-seamed for structural integrity (you don't have any)
– Shoulder taping for emotional support / gossip transport / corporate burden
– Unisex fit for all flavors of burnout
– Direct-to-garment print with pressure you can feel